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Getting defensive One of the most frustrating behaviors for the loved ones of insecure men is their tendency to get defensive when you challenge them or suggest that they were wrong about something.
With insecure men, their ego is shaky to begin with, so anything that suggests that they were wrong or inadequate is met with a hostile defense. These men are more fragile than most people would believe; it’s only the romantic partners or families of these men who know just how insecure they really are.
Comparing themselves to others Insecure men often use social comparison in daily life.
The overall lesson As frustrating as insecure men can be when you date them, please remember to view the problem through a lens of empathy.
Some insecure men will also idealize men in successful positions or men who seem to “have it all” on the surface: the pretty younger girlfriend, the family man whose home life always seems happy and free of problems or tensions, or the bachelor who has freedom and social excitement in his life.
Carrying a “chip” on their shoulder or caring about trivial things Insecure men are pretty transparent, even though many want to believe that no one can see through them.
In other words, remember that no one wants to feel the way that insecure man feels, and that the poor guy hasn’t quite figured out how to “be” yet in his life.
If you start dating an insecure man, don’t play therapist and psychoanalyze him: “I think these are your insecurities.” Instead of turning him into your patient, say this instead: “I think you’re awesome, and I think you’re fine as is.